Thoughts regarding the Golden Globes

-Was I the only one who got sick of all the hype about them serving booze? Stop hitting me over the head with it, a'ite? We get it...those crazy actors could potentially get buzzed and act funny/stupid/controversial. Don't care. Unless Tara Reid was in attendance.

-Scarlett is hot. D'uh. While a little bit Jersey for my californian and midwestern roots, she is second only to Charlize at the top of the list. Still, her bridge-n-tunnel thing does put her in danger of being knocked down by another voluptuous blonde, the model-doctor from Gray's Anatomy. I don't watch the show, only peer over whatever I am reading whenever Mel has it on and whatever-her-name-is is on screen. Promise.

-Mariah Carey looks like a blow up sex doll.

-Paul Giametti got robbed of his pity award. Jeremy Pivens got robbed as well. Oh, speaking of Pics, was he hitting on that reporter? Love the guy.

-Philip Seymour Hoffman: great actor, crappy thank-you-speech-giver.

-I'm going to hell for not seeing the Cash movie, right? I just cannot get over Reese Witherspoon: her presence on screen makes me vomit a little in my mouth. Ryan Phillipe certainly had himself draped all over his (vomit inducing) wife last night. Melissa swears it's because he's loving and supportive and affectionate. I think he's a greedy screen-stealing mooch.

-Brokeback Mountain. Haven't seen it yet. Mostly because I live in the Midwest and I imagine that the same people who protest abortion clinics are taking time off to stone those leaving the theatre. I am damn sick of all of the hoopla about this being a controversial movie, though. It's just a story about some kinda forbidden love, right? Kinda like Romeo & Juliet, with butt sex, right?

-Clooney is a cool f'ing guy. The man's man of this generation. And you've gotta love his quote, ""And who'd name a kid Jack, with a last name that ends with 'off'".

-Where the hell was TomKat? I needed my crazy fix of the day.

-I cannot hear anything about The Chronicles of Narnia without singing Lazy Sunday. It's all about the hamiltons ba-bee.

-I would totally date Drew Barrymore, but she looked kinda scary. I'm not sure how she walked in heals without tripping over her own boobs. Put a leash on those things. The bra-less look with invisible material is usually a good thing. In this case I didn't need to see where her babies feed.

-Lost deserved to win, mostly because I don't watch any of the other shows.

-I once watched "House" for about 17 minutes. I found the lead character- whose girl name is escaping me- so unbelievably annoying that I almost went and got all stabby. Apparently I am the only one.

-Mary Louis Parker winning for Weeds over every single one of the over rated, getting more desperate by the minute housewives= awesome, especially after Chris Rock's "one of these kids is doing hew own thing" monologue.

-When did Geena Davis get fat?